Explorer Issues

ie10If you’re using the browser with the blue “e” icon, stop. The Department of Homeland Security says Internet Explorer has a bug in it that will cause all kinds of security problems especially if your office is still running Windows XP. Using Explorer alone is bad enough, but since Microsoft stopped supporting XP it’s even worse on those computers. At least you’ll have an excuse for that next charge on the Visa you forgot to tell your spouse about.

Here comes the … BILL!

wedding moneyWeddings are not just expensive to throw, but go to. According to a survey by American Express, this year’s cost of showing up for a wedding will cost a guest about $539 and a member of the wedding party $577, each is 75% more than in 2012. The major buck busters are jewelry, clothes, and babysitting or pet sitting. And then there’s the wedding gift. The average cost for a gift is $97 for a friend and $144 for a family member. What I like to do to a couple is go to their house like a year later and ask them to see what you bought them.  Then watch as the look of sheer terror comes over both their faces!

Mall Lanes

mall lanesIf you ever thought the mall needed to have fast and slow lanes, you’re wish may come true. A 10-year-old girl who was tired of being stuck behind slow walkers at a British mall wrote them a letter and asked them to divide the halls into “fast” and “slow” lanes, and they have. Of course, just like the roads in England, they appear to be on the ‘wrong’ side to us.  What they also need is a parking area outside Victoria’s Secret for all the guys who don’t want to go in with their wives or girlfriends.

IsTheBathroomFree?

bathroom-occupiedOne of the great questions in the office is, “is the bathroom free?’ You’d hate to walk the 50 feet only to find yourself standing outside. That’s why someone came up with the IsTheBathroomFree app. Your office buy the sensors for the doors and employees download the app and if the urge hits and you don’t want to waste the steps you can just open the app and it will tell you if it’s occupied. It also needs an air sensor to let you know whether or not it’s safe to go into.

Suspended Over a Question…

questionSuspended over a question. Granted, it was one he was asked not to ask but he’s an 18 year old kid. It’s his life mission to do the opposite of what he’s told. A Pennsylvania teenager is suspended for asking Miss America to prom during an assembly. She was there to talk to the kids about following their dreams, and when it was question time, he stepped up to the plate and tried to hit a home run. Of course, word got around before the assembly that he was going to do it so school administrators pulled him aside and told him not to. He did anyway and was shot down…in front of the entire school. Given he’s now the talk of the school, the suspension is probably the best thing that could have happened to him.

The Affable Bubba Watson

unnamedBubba Watson made it rain at Waffle House. It’s his thing, when he wins a tournament, he goes to Waffle House. After he had the green jacket slipped on him Sunday, he hit the one in Augusta , where he had a double grilled cheese with a side of hash browns, and whatever else for his wife and four or five friends…so the bill was what, $18-$20? He left a $148 tip on the bill.  Wonder what he’ll leave the dry cleaner for getting the grease stain out of the jacket?

Sharknado’s BACK

SharknadoPoster_2616393bYou can be in the sequel to the SYFY movie, “Sharknado”. Producers say they’re trying to raise $50-thousand dollars for a bonus scene that would include “chainsaws being used in the vicinity of sharks.” So they’ve decided to finance that scene through the website, IndieGoGo, and among the things your money can buy are:

–For $45, they’ll name a shark that appears in the movie after you.

–If you fork over $120 bucks, they’ll record your scream and use it in a scene

–$5,000 bucks gets you a walk-on with either a death scene or a heroic scene

“Sharknado 2,” will be out July 31. Just when you thought it was safe to turn SyFy back on.

(Actually, it’s never been safe.)

Google Glass

glassIf you want to get on the upside of the curve, tomorrow is the day you can buy Google Glass glasses. It’s the first time you, me and every average person can buy a pair. Up until now they were only sold to Google “Explorers”. Feelings are mixed on them. Some call it the future of computing, others call it the downfall of personal computing and it takes even less effort to be connected and zone out. People wearing them have been banned from bars and restaurants, given tickets for distracted driving…and since you won’t have your phone in your hand when you run into something, people will just think you’re an idiot.

NBC Needs YOUR Ideas

TLCHere’s your chance to come up with a TV show. NBC is asking for you, the average Joe, to pitch sitcom ideas o them. Your ideas will be given to Jason Bateman, Sean Hayes, Seth Meyers, Amy Poehler, and several funny, creative people to review and vote on. Which is curious, if you’re paying these very creative, talented people why not ask them for ideas? Isn’t that what they get paid for? But maybe they’re doing it. Get a bunch of ideas from the public and show that they’re no better than what they’re coming up with already. It’s scary to think Honey Boo Boo may be the pinnacle!

Resurrection of a Vette

vetteThe last ‘Vette is out. Workers have recovered the eighth and final Corvette from the sinkhole that swallowed them at the National Corvette Museum in Bowling Green, KY in February. The 2001 Mallett Hammer Z06 was found upside-down about 40 feet underground and they look nothing like Corvettes anymore, especially this one. they say it’s the one in the worst condition.  You can see all of them, as the museum will have them on display through August. They’ll then send them to a General Motors plant in Michigan to be repaired.