Why Can’t I Breathe?

So for the past six months, my nose has been clogged up. I’ve never had allergies before. I have had head colds and things, but this stuffy nose has been persistent. 

 

 

 

It’s like I can’t get enough to breathe, all the time. I feel like I’m dying. It’s awful. 

 

 

 

 

Okay. Here we go. It’s gonna get gross…

 

 

BS

 

 

 

I get these really hard boogers in the back recesses of my nostrils. They’re about the size of a pea, but when I am able to blow them out [or pick them using my finger and then washing said finger], I can breathe for about two hours. After the two hours, those hard boogers are back. This past weekend, I did my ritual of nose cleaning, and my nose started to bleed. I immediately went on the internet. 

 

 

 

photo (1)

 

Beavis on Computer

 

 

WebMD told me I had something lodged in my nose. 

 

 

I Don't Get It

 

 

So I continue to do this…. while looking like this… 

 

 

cry

 

 

 

in my dreams. These people also told me about a neti pot. I think I read somewhere that a neti pot can kill you.

 

 

 

 

 

I’ve been using Vick’s infused tissues. But they’re not helping that much. 

 

 

 

 

I’m afraid of the doctor because I’m pretty sure this could happen……

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

or this

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

What do you do? What are your sure fire ways of getting rid of stuffy noses? Comment below!

 

 

 

 

30 Hashtags Every Thirtysomething Actually Needs

I’m just shy of the big 3-0, but these are #totes applicable.

 

1.
 

Fox 2000
2.
 

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5.
 

7.
 
30 Hashtags Every Thirtysomething Actually Needs
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9.
 
30 Hashtags Every Thirtysomething Actually Needs
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30 Hashtags Every Thirtysomething Actually Needs
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13.
 
30 Hashtags Every Thirtysomething Actually Needs
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NBC
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30 Hashtags Every Thirtysomething Actually Needs
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30 Hashtags Every Thirtysomething Actually Needs
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Via GettyImagesEntertainment
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30 Hashtags Every Thirtysomething Actually Needs
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30 Hashtags Every Thirtysomething Actually Needs
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30.
 

GLEE’s 100th Episode Didn’t Disappoint

So, I had to catch up on Glee last night. I had missed a couple epi’s due to wanting to go to sleep at decent hours in the evenings. 

 

First off. That nationals episode? What the flip, Glee? I did NOT see that one coming. 

 

I was already an emotional wreck. And then the next episode. Part 1 of the 100th Episode special. These 17 important moments from a BuzzFeed article, pretty much sums up my feels. 

 

 

1. April Rhodes, maybe the most beloved New Directions honorary member, returned.

 
17 Important Moments From The 100th Episode Of "Glee" That Brought The Show Back To Its Roots
Fox

And once she finishes her wine, she’s totally going to save New Directions.

2. And finally gave New Directions the opportunity to perform “Raise Your Glass.”

 
17 Important Moments From The 100th Episode Of "Glee" That Brought The Show Back To Its Roots
Fox

Not to be outdone by the Warblers, everyone literally raised glasses.

3. Santana, Quinn, and Brittany recreated their steamy “Toxic” performance.

Fox / Via stydiaislove

Fox / Via stydiaislove

 
 

4. And Santana convinced Brittany to sing and dance to “Valerie” with her.

Fox / Via allisonargents

Fox / Via allisonargents

 
 

Because Santana wants Brittany to stop being a math guinea pig and return to what she loves most: dancing. Brittana forever.

5. Puck serenaded Quinn with “Keep Holding On.”

Fox / Via na-page

Fox / Via na-page

 
 

Because she showed up with a jerk boyfriend and he wanted to remind her he could still cut her heart. He can and he cuts harder than a knife.

6. Holly Holiday, another favorite guest and friend of April, made an appearance.

Fox / Via julieandrews

Fox / Via julieandrews

 
 

And acknowledged the most important Glee Facebook page that should exist in real life.

7. And led the gang in a no-frills production of “Happy.”

Fox / Via krantzelijah

Fox / Via krantzelijah

 
 

Remember when New Directions’ performances were just singing and dancing in the choir room? Those were the best. And apparently, if they had just stuck to those, New Directions wouldn’t be cut due to the insane financial burden it puts on the school.

8. Brittany put her math skills to use.

 
17 Important Moments From The 100th Episode Of "Glee" That Brought The Show Back To Its Roots
 

9. And Brittany’s AMAZING web series had another installment.

 
17 Important Moments From The 100th Episode Of "Glee" That Brought The Show Back To Its Roots
Fox

Can this be a spin-off?

10. There was one more diva-off.

 
17 Important Moments From The 100th Episode Of "Glee" That Brought The Show Back To Its Roots
Fox

Because Rachel and Mercedes needed to know once and for all who was the all-star of New Directions.

11. To, of course, “Defying Gravity.”

 
17 Important Moments From The 100th Episode Of "Glee" That Brought The Show Back To Its Roots
Fox

Can you ever hear “Defying Gravity” too many times? No, no you can’t. And by no, I mean yes.

12. Santana gave another epic bitch-rant.

http://metropass.tumblr.com/post/80060737233

Fox

http://metropass.tumblr.com/post/80060737233

Fox

 
 

Long live Santana.

13. And Puck worried his affair with Quinn would always haunt him.

 
 
 
 

14. Brittana made out!

 
17 Important Moments From The 100th Episode Of "Glee" That Brought The Show Back To Its Roots

Finallllllly.

15. And so did Puck and Quinn!

Fox / Via lauriesholden

Fox / Via lauriesholden

 
 

I mean, of course she wasn’t going to let him leave. But a dramatic run down the hallway made it so much better.

16. Finn was given a permanent resting place in the auditorium.

 
 

And it was extremely emotional. ALL OF THE FEELS.

17. But the original gang was all together for one last time.

 
 

And they said goodbye.

The second half of the Glee two-part 100th episode special airs on Tuesday, March 25 at 8 p.m. on Fox.

So…. I thought I was the “Wheel of Fortune” Champion

I’m pretty awesome as I am playing Wheel of Fortune at home on the couch in front of the television. Nuh-uh. I don’t think I could beat this guy!

 

A Wheel of Fortune contestant solved tonight’s puzzle with his first guess after only correctly picking two letters of the puzzle:

 

Insane Wheel Of Fortune Puzzle Guess Almost Too Good To Be True

 

 

Host Pat Sajak couldn’t believe it:

 

Insane Wheel Of Fortune Puzzle Guess Almost Too Good To Be True

 

 

He even gave the contestant a pat down:

 

Insane Wheel Of Fortune Puzzle Guess Almost Too Good To Be True

 

Check out the video of the whole thing!

 

 

An App That Can Math?!

So, there’s this APP called MyScript Calculator. It recognizes your handwriting and does math problems for you!

 

 

tim blog1

 

 

 

Tim Blog 3

 

 

 

OMG

 

 

 

It also does more complicated things….

Tim Blog 2

 

 

 

Like finds the values of variables and unknowns!

 

tim blog 4

 

 

Ellen Selfie

 

 

Where was this when I was in high school math. No, even better… COLLEGE???!!!!????!!!!

 

Jimmy

 

 

It’s FREE, too!

 

Peter Dance Lalala

Onesies!

At OnePiece, a Norway company, it’s all about comfort and leisure. So much in fact, that you can get some hoodies and lounge pants. AAAANNNDD you can also get a onesie! Or 5!

OMG!

 

YES PLEASE! A country that I can wear nothing but onesies?!?! Sign me up!

 

 

Original Onesie Royal Blue

 

Original Onesie Fern Green

 

One Direction All Over Print White Zip

 

Art Onesie White / Multicolor

 

Paisley Onesie Light Grey / Multicolor

 

Snowball Onesie Pink

 

Fitted Onesie Calypso Coral

 

I WANT THEM ALL!

funny-gifs-want

 

 

65 Songs You Will Never Be Able To Listen To The Same Way Again

Well, that’s interesting! WARNING: Some facts are rated PG-13!

 

1. Aerosmith’s “I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing” was originally written for Celine Dion.

 

2. The song “Torn” by Natalie Imbruglia is actually a cover. The original is by Ednaswap.

 

3. “Tainted Love” is also a cover. The original is by Gloria Jones and came out in 1964.

 

4. ALSO “Girls Just Wanna Have Fun” is a cover of some dude. The original is by a guy named Robert Hazard.

 

5. One last one: “I Love Rock & Roll” is a cover. It was originally by The Arrows, not Joan Jett.

 

 

 

6. The song “Sweet Child of Mine” was written in five minutes.

 

7. The song “Like a Virgin” is actually about a guy getting over a breakup.

 

8. Little Richard’s “Tutti Frutti” is actually about anal sex.

 

9. The song “Summer of 69” by Bryan Adams is about 69’ing, like, sexually. In this interview, he said: “Some parts [of the song] are autobiographical, but the title comes from the idea of 69 as a metaphor for sex. Most people thought it was about the year 1969.”

 

10. Serial killer Aileen Wuornos was obsessed with Natalie Merchant’s “Carnival.” She requested they play it at her funeral. 

 

11. Billy Joel’s “Only the Good Die Young” is about a man trying to convince a Catholic girl to lose her virginity to him.

 

12. Sarah McLachlan’s song “Angel” is about heroin addiction.

 

13. The song “Closing Time” by Semisonic is not about closing a bar, it’s about the birth of the lead singer’s son.

 

 

)

 

14. “Zombie” by The Cranberries is about terrorism in Northern Ireland.

 

15. “Slide” by The Goo Goo Dolls is about abortion. youtube.com

 

16. “Brick” by Ben Folds Five is also about abortion.

 

17. And “The Freshman” by The Verve Pipe is about abortion as well.

 

18. Shel Silverstein wrote “A Boy Named Sue.”

 

19. “Gettin’ Jiggy wit It” was written by Nas.

 

20. The song “Scary Monsters and Nice Sprites” samples this YouTube video of a girl stacking cups. 

 

21. Justin Timberlake’s “Rock Your Body” was written by Pharrell for Michael Jackson’s final album, Invincible.

 

 

)

 

22. “…Baby One More Time” was rejected by TLC.

 

23. Rihanna’s “Umbrella” was supposed to be a Britney Spears song.

 

24. Leona Lewis was originally supposed to sing Rihanna’s “We Found Love.”

 

25. “Toxic” was intended for Kylie Minogue, not Britney Spears.

 

26. Britney Spears’ “I’m a Slave 4 U” was written for Janet Jackson.

 

 

)

 

27. “Semi-Charmed Life” is about a couple on a crystal meth binge. 

 

28. “1985” by Bowling for Soup is originally by the band SR-71.

 

29. “Red Red Wine” by UB40 was originally recorded by Neil Diamond

 

30. Prince wrote Sinead O’Connor’s “Nothing Compares 2 U.” 

 

31. “The Way” by Fastball is about an elderly couple who went missing and were later found dead in a ravine.

 

32. Bruce Springsteen wrote “Blinded by the Light.”

 

33. “Since U Been Gone” was turned down by Pink and Hilary Duff before Kelly Clarkson recorded it.

 

 

 

34. Bruno Mars wrote CeeLo Green’s “Forget You.”

 

35. “Me and Mr. Jones” by Amy Winehouse is about Nas. 

 

36. Avril Lavigne helped write the Kelly Clarkson song “Breakaway.” It was meant to go on Avril’s first album, the one with “Sk8er Boi” and “Complicated,” but it didn’t really fit with her image.

 

37. “How Will I Know” by Whitney Houston was originally supposed to be for Janet Jackson.

 

38. Kylie Minogue’s “Can’t Get You Out of My Head” was written for S Club 7.

 

 

 

39. Jesse McCartney wrote Leona Lewis’ “Bleeding Love.”

 

40. Frank Ocean wrote the Justin Bieber song “Bigger.” 

 

41. Aretha Franklin’s “Respect” was written by Otis Redding. 

 

42. “You Oughta Know” by Alanis Morissette is about Dave Coulier (from Full House).

 

43. “Ben” by Michael Jackson was originally intended for Donny Osmond.

 

44. Eve 6’s “Here’s to the Night” is about a one-night stand.

 

45. Miley Cyrus’ “We Can’t Stop” was originally intended for Rihanna.

 

46. “Bad” was originally supposed to be a duet between Michael Jackson and Prince. 

 

 

)

 

47. The song “Hey Ya” by Outkast is actually about a man stuck in a loveless relationship.

 

48. The DMB song “Crash” is sung from the perspective of a peeping tom.

 

49. “Disturbia” by Rihanna was originally a Chris Brown song.

 

50. Billy Joel’s “Uptown Girl” MAY actually be about his then-fling, Elle Macpherson.

 

51. Peter Gabriel’s “In Your Eyes” is about his then-girlfriend, Rosanna Arquette.

 

52. Lori Lieberman wrote “Killing Me Softly,” not Roberta Flack.

 

53. Shania Twain or Faith Hill were both given the opportunity to record Beyoncé’s “Irreplaceable.” 

 

 

)

 

54. “Candle in the Wind” was originally written about Marilyn Monroe but rewritten about Princess Diana when she was killed and titled “Goodbye England’s Rose.”

 

55. Bob Marley’s “I Shot The Sheriff” is about birth control. Bob Marley didn’t want his girlfriend to take birth control pills. The doctor who prescribed the pills was the sheriff.

 

56. The song “There She Goes” by Sixpence None the Richer is about heroin. The song was actually originally by The La’s too.

 

57. LFO’s “Girl on TV” is about Jennifer Love Hewitt.

 

58. Usher’s “Burn” is about Chilli from TLC.

 

59. The song “Hollaback Girl” by Gwen Stefani was written in response to something Courtney Love said about Gwen in Seventeen magazine.

 

60. Madonna’s “Take a Bow” is reportedly about Sean Penn. youtube.com

 

61. “Hero” by Mariah Carey was originally intended for Gloria Estefan.

 

62. Lady Gaga’s “Telephone” was originally written for Britney Spears. You can listen to Britney’s demo here.

 

63. Prince wrote The Bangles’ “Manic Monday.”

 

 

)

 

64. The song “Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds” is not about an LSD trip. It’s about a painting John Lennon’s son drew for him.

 

65. Prince’s song “1999” is about nuclear war. 

 

Hmmm… 

Dr. Steve Brule OMG

 

I got this snippet of awesome from Buzzfeed. Check out the full article here.